Thursday, June 30, 2011

Appearences

At age twelve, I look like this:

No, I'm not the proudest of how I look, but sometimes I think of myself as pretty, and other times I look in the mirror and almost barf. I wonder why that is. I never wear makeup, so my appearence is in no way altered by that. It's just sometimes I like how I look and sometimes I.... Dont.
     And than I wonder how the world sees me. What do people see when they look at my face? Do they think I'm pretty, or ugly? Because the truth it, it DOES matter how other people see you, not just how you see you. It's all abuot looks now, in the world. Life is so much easier for the pretty girls, and I know that though I'll never be one of them, I'd sure like to be, and so would everybody else despite what they say. People are kinder to them, opportunities come by more. All because you have a pretty face. Which, to sum it up, really sucks. BEcause not all of us have pretty faces, but I guess that's just how the world is-unfair.
     

Live.Love.Laugh


Cameryn

Needless to say, everywhere I go, There's always that one total bitch.
      At Baymar, that girl is Cameryn. She walks and talks like she's at least 14 or 15, but she's my age, 12. Her hair is always seemingly effortlessly perfect, and she keeps flirting with James, a guy whos about to go to SENIOR HIGH in our group. I want to barf every time I see her do it. It's revolting, and she clearly doesn't know it.
     I've always stood up for people, always. And until a few days ago, i never imagined there would be bullying or a reason to stand up for anyone at freaking summer camp! I mean, we're only going to be there for a week or two, and we spend way to much energy on the horses. But Cameryn's been riding there all her life, and she gets PAID to be there. I mean, WTF? So obviously she's comfortable enough to pick on other people.
     We were playing egyption ratscrew, a card game made wildly popular at camp by me an some other girls. Cameryn had sat down to a game with us, and so did a girl named... wats it, Shana? Well, Shana is kinda on the plump sde and rather annoying, but she doesn't mean any harm. While she was away throwing something out in the trash, Cameryn grabbed her cards and tossed them to Sam, the girl siting next to me. She said "Guys, just take them, take them." And we all thought (well, i hope we all did. I did anyway) it was some sort of prank and we'd give the cards back once she asked for them, but we didn't. After a few times of "Where did my cards go?" Shana seemed to get it. But instead of taking the message and walking away like I would have, probably with some comment like "Wow, Cameryn, how low can you be?" Shana just kept on going, like "What, did the cards just walk off the table?" And being gullible me, I took some of her cards from Sam's pile, but no one noticed. After a while, Shana began to cry, but Cameryn still played dumb. It was the most disgusting thing I'd ever seen. I kept looking questioningly at Cameryn, like "shouldn't we give them back now?" but Cameryn never responded. And she kept taunting Shana by saying things like "Would you like us to give you some of our cards?" and "What's wrong, Shana?" "Why are you crying, Shana?"
         And I just let it drag, because I'm not interested in making enemies, and frankly, Cameryn is not someone I want to make an enemy out of. I felt really bad for Shana, but I guess it was her own fault for making a fool of herself by not walking away. She'll learn, in time, and though it was mean, it's things like this that're gonna teach her. It's how I learned.
         When you are better or, should I say, more ahead in the wisdom of life, there are two ways you can treat people who are behind you. Mostly there are people who treat them nicely, knowing that in time they will grow and catch up. Then there are the people who treat them horridly, forcing them to learn the lessons that push them ahead. BUt unfortunately,this is the only or at least most effective way to teach. So though the people who are nice are those who we enjoy, it is people like Cameryn who really push us in life.